Chapter Three Continued:
I was no longer tied. I opened my gritty eyes and felt the cool sea breeze on my face. It came from the open balcony across from me. My leathers had been restored, my boots sat beside the bed. My weapons were nowhere to be seen but that wasn't surprising. I noted the pitcher glistening with condensation across the room. A strong enough lure to get me moving. I felt weak as a kitten, staggering drunkenly across the room to the life-giving water. I downed the entire pitcher and still thirsted. But I felt steadier and took better stock of my surroundings. The balcony was high enough that even I probably wouldn't survive the jump to the rocks below. I could perhaps scale the side of the building, but I wouldn't have the information I needed. The door was locked, barred, from the outside. So I'd wait. I hoped they remembered that humans needed food. I was starving. I had no idea how long they'd had me strapped to that table, how many times they'd put me under, how much blood they'd taken. I did have one piece of knowledge to work with. They definitely wanted me alive. They'd take pains to keep me that way. Therefore I had some leverage, a bargaining chip if need be.
When the bolt finally slid, I was standing at the balcony staring out at the endless waves. I heard the door open and let my body tense, though I didn't turn around. The door closed with a click, and I felt the presence of "other". I hadn't had many experiences with this feeling, besides Frank. And a smell tickled my nostrils. Wood and pipe smoke. When he said my name, I did turn. In shock and anger. He repeated it.
"Graham Tanner, do not be alarmed."
Goddamn Frank stood across the white room from me, his posture wary.
I spat the first thing that came to mind. "Mother fucking liar! Rat bastard back-stabbing son of a bitch!"
He sighed, though he only did this for my benefit. Fucking vamps didn't need to fucking breathe.
"Graham, sit down." He gestured to a chair beside me on the balcony.
"You lied to me."
"No, I did not. Please sit. I only have a few minutes with you until..."
"Until what, Frank? They kill me? They finish draining me? You said you hated these fuckers-"
"I never said that. I said I'd become disgusted with them. SIT DOWN." Gone was the pleading old man, in his place the powerful monster.
I sat.
He joined me in the opposing chair. He rubbed the bridge of his nose before looking me straight in the eyes. "What have they told you?" he asked.
I glared at him. "Nothing. They stole my blood and drugged me. That's it."
"I was informed that the brothers visited you. They told you nothing?"
Brothers. My heart rate picked up, my depleted blood struggling to feed my organs. "No," I croaked out.
Frank looked worried again. "You need to feed," he stated.
"Goddamn right I do." My voice sounded almost level. "Your minutes are ticking, Frank."
"Yes. I'm here to warn you, Graham Tanner. I have told you the truth in our meetings, but not the whole truth. You must be prepared. You are strong, but they have weakened you by taking your blood."
"Why?" I interrupted. "Why do they want my blood? And no more half-truths Frank."
"They need your blood. Their supply has run out. They harvested from you when you arrived in this time and you escaped them. They have been trying to get me to lure you to them since then. I have refused. I believe we should go back to the old ways, before..." He paused. I waited. I couldn't quite get enough air.
"You know of the Project Genesis, Graham Tanner?" he finally asked. Slowly, carefully.
The meager blood in my body-enough to keep me alive but not enough for this-drained from my head.
I awoke to Frank's face hovering above mine, and the smell of food. He pulled back and shoved a plate at me as I sat up in the chair. "Eat," he ordered.
Chicken. A rare steak. Potatoes. I looked at him askance.
"They keep food for their supply," he told me.
I knew what he meant. The poor bastards they fed on. I ate it anyway, knowing I had to keep my strength. I washed it down with thick milk. When I was done, I set the plate down and settled back in the chair. Twilight brought with it the buzzing of insects, the call of birds, the crashing of waves.
I began.
"Genesis was the project my wife was working on. She was a medical doctor, but more she was a scientist. She was striving to make the world a better place, to eradicate disease." I watched Frank nod and wondered about his precious minutes. "How long do we have?"
"I talked them into a few more minutes," he said with a half-smile.
"So anyway, it was pretty much done before she...when she..."
"Almost burned to death," Frank supplied.
"How do you know?" I demanded. "How could you possibly know about any of this?"
"Project Genesis only existed because your wife was studying you Graham Tanner. Your blood made it possible."
"No." I shook my head to emphasize this, and felt a tremor start in my cheek. "Impossible."
"Why? She had in her hands a perfect human. Never ill, quick healing, invincible. Or very nearly so." He leaned forward. "Just like us."
I stood and went to the railing. No. She wouldn't have done that. Not without my consent. Not without my knowledge. She loved me.
A memory, foggy and distant, wriggled out of my subconscious. A prick on the arm. Awakening. Seeing her lovely face over mine. "Go back to sleep, my love," she intoned softly. And I had.
Trust.
I whirled on Frank. "Why are you here?"
"As I told you. The brothers came to me this morning. They told me they had you, and asked if I might help them convince you to help them. I agreed. I lied to them, Graham Tanner. I do not want them to succeed. If they do, then mankind is truly lost. And we will squander the Earth and destroy ourselves."
"I don't understand, Frank." I paced to the chair, then back. "What does Project Genesis and my wife have to do with anything? What-"
The door to the room opened. Frank sprang to his feet and flourished a bow so quickly I hardly saw him move. I turned to the door, and saw. The food had revived me, but God help me, I would rather have faced oblivion again than what stood before me.
"Hello Graham," she said, uncertain and beautiful beyond compare and looking at me from alien eyes.
Helen. My wife.
Thursday, October 3, 2013
Spinning toward Samhain
One of my favorite things here is sitting around my living room with my roommates and talking about whatever comes to mind. There is usually some sort of tea involved and music as well. It is so peaceful and comforting to know that I have such dear friends to spend time with, to tell about my day, and to just be with. And I love the fact that Molly and I have now lived together for more than six months and we still get along wonderfully and love each other.
Today was the second day that I attended a spin class at the gym where Kate teaches yoga. I was talked into it by the nice spin instructor and yesterday was my virgin day. I like it, though I'm nowhere near the level some of my fellows are. But I'm sweating hard and plan to go back for more. The only downfall is the sore bum that comes from the seats, but I'm told that I'll build calluses there? Not sure how I feel about that but we shall see what that means. I'm very stoked because I've actually lost ten pounds since my visit home, and that's inspiring for more action! Not only that, but leaf raking is right around the corner so I can get out and enjoy this LOVELY fall weather! September in Asheville might actually convince me to hang out here longer than February!
In other news, the Dachshund Dali and my boy black cat Hades touched noses today, a definite improvement on their previous relationship! All good things come with time! AND we're going to throw a wonderful Halloween party which I need to get busy on! In the next few days I need to clean out the basement. Oh my god, that is going to be terrifying! But no pain no gain, or no terror no turnout or something like that. Anyway, wish me luck on THAT one!
Not a whole lot else happening, just contentment and hard workouts and sunshine and peace. I love it. And all of you!
Shanti Elena
A picture of two dog sisters to end with :)
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Sisters and Savannah
It's Sunday night and the moon is bright
I've sent my sister off on an afternoon flight
I love my sister, I can't wait to see her soon
Under a cold December moon
We've a house full of dogs tonight as Kate has her babies over for a sleepover. It's wonderful to have so much canine energy! I had a lovely weekend with my sister Lindsay and I'm sad to see her go. We got to spend a lot of time together though so that is very good. We took a trip to Savannah and boy is that a beautiful place! We also went to her friend's wedding and I got to meet her Doctor friends, all very nice welcoming people. Today we spent some time in Asheville and then drove to Charlotte to drop her at the airport. Lots and lots of driving this weekend! But it was still very fun and comforting. Family is just amazing for that, isn't it?
Here's some pictures of Savannah:
I am very excited to begin work on my book tomorrow. It feels like it's been forever since I've really sat down with those characters, my imaginary friends and adventurers. I miss them, and an extended visit with them is in order!
Isn't it interesting how Mondays can be either dreaded or looked-forward to? Tomorrow feels like a new beginning, a springboard for not only my books but for my outlook on life. I plan to do instead of sit and think of doing. Optimism at its finest, and excitement. Did y'all know that stress is only fear? If we weren't afraid, we wouldn't be stressed. I plan on being as stress free as possible in the upcoming months. I plan to work hard and look ahead to wonderful things while still appreciating this moment. As I will, so mote it be.
Shanti Elena
I've sent my sister off on an afternoon flight
I love my sister, I can't wait to see her soon
Under a cold December moon
We've a house full of dogs tonight as Kate has her babies over for a sleepover. It's wonderful to have so much canine energy! I had a lovely weekend with my sister Lindsay and I'm sad to see her go. We got to spend a lot of time together though so that is very good. We took a trip to Savannah and boy is that a beautiful place! We also went to her friend's wedding and I got to meet her Doctor friends, all very nice welcoming people. Today we spent some time in Asheville and then drove to Charlotte to drop her at the airport. Lots and lots of driving this weekend! But it was still very fun and comforting. Family is just amazing for that, isn't it?
Here's some pictures of Savannah:
Our Creepy Hostel with the rubberpants covered beds
Linds and a statue in a park, one of 20 something parks and statues
The graveyard!
It was twilight in the graveyard, and some of the graves were so old that the etchings had completely worn off
Spanish moss in the graveyard
An impromptu Blues festival two blocks down from us in the forbidden park! (The hostel owner told us not to go there after dark)
Nighttime fountain
I liked these stairs
This is at Fort Pulasky
Cannons and marshland with a sister in the middle
Shoot it yonder!!
The fascinating underhill bunkers, reminiscent of Hobbiton
Inside the underhill bunkers
Just a little spooky
And these are from the wedding:
Centerpiece close-up
The bones of an old barn
I am very excited to begin work on my book tomorrow. It feels like it's been forever since I've really sat down with those characters, my imaginary friends and adventurers. I miss them, and an extended visit with them is in order!
Isn't it interesting how Mondays can be either dreaded or looked-forward to? Tomorrow feels like a new beginning, a springboard for not only my books but for my outlook on life. I plan to do instead of sit and think of doing. Optimism at its finest, and excitement. Did y'all know that stress is only fear? If we weren't afraid, we wouldn't be stressed. I plan on being as stress free as possible in the upcoming months. I plan to work hard and look ahead to wonderful things while still appreciating this moment. As I will, so mote it be.
Shanti Elena
Saturday, September 21, 2013
I'll Give You Something to Blog About!
Shalom and Good Afternoon
It's a rainy Saturday here in the western North Carolina mountains, the first day it's really felt like fall. I'm actually wearing jeans today. I've just finished giving myself a pedicure and decided that it's a wonderful time to put some words down. Words are pretty amazing little things, they have so much power and majesty. I made the decision many years ago that I wanted to work with words, form a close and intimate relationship with them. They help me create new worlds and they help me convey emotion and experience and laughter and tears. It is so much easier to express one's true emotion though pen and paper or keyboard and computer. Arguments and highly emotional confrontations cause the brain to seize up, the words to not come. How many times after a conversation do we think, "If only I'd said THIS, then that'd show them!" Or something along those lines.
I've noticed too that people feel more comfortable behind a computer screen. My experiences in online dating have convinced me of that. You have time to formulate responses. It doesn't matter what you look like or what you're wearing, you could be naked and picking your nose. The other person only perceives what you want them to. You are, in fact, creating a persona as you type. Say what you think they want to hear. Ask probing, meaningful questions that you had some time to come up with. Be funny, be intriguing, be what you've perhaps never been in real life; real conversation, real eye contact/facial expression land.
I fear we are losing these key communication skills. It scares me. How can one pick up on non-verbal cues if one is not exposed to them? How will this guy know if I'm upset if he's never seen it? How will that guy know that I'm smiling at his witticisms? It's a quandary, no doubt about it. And I want to be known, just like everyone else. I want people to know the real me, and to appreciate the person that I've forged over my 34 years.
It does happen, though, that sometimes the stars align, there's a harvest moon, or whatever fateful circumstances fall into place for meeting a truly neat person. I've met many very cool people here, and this week I met another. He's very nice and I'm excited to have a new friend. He's a musician and he's funny and he's straightforward and honest. He's a man, and I appreciate the heck out of that!
I also need to decide what I'm going to be for Halloween. Any suggestions? Also, totally stoked that my Little Dr. Smell (aka my sister Lindsay) is coming to visit next weekend. We are heading down to Savannah for a night on a mini road trip that should be very fun. And the following week I start on the editing process of Saving Haven. Plus I started a 40 day Pilates challenge that I'm three days into. Abs of steel coming up baby!
This was a bit of a ramble, but I did say I'd blog twice a week so this is what happened. I hope all are well, I miss so many of you, and I want to throw it out there, albeit a little early, that I am planning on having a Fancy Dress White Elephant party when I come home in December. You've all been warned!
Shanti Elena
It's a rainy Saturday here in the western North Carolina mountains, the first day it's really felt like fall. I'm actually wearing jeans today. I've just finished giving myself a pedicure and decided that it's a wonderful time to put some words down. Words are pretty amazing little things, they have so much power and majesty. I made the decision many years ago that I wanted to work with words, form a close and intimate relationship with them. They help me create new worlds and they help me convey emotion and experience and laughter and tears. It is so much easier to express one's true emotion though pen and paper or keyboard and computer. Arguments and highly emotional confrontations cause the brain to seize up, the words to not come. How many times after a conversation do we think, "If only I'd said THIS, then that'd show them!" Or something along those lines.
I've noticed too that people feel more comfortable behind a computer screen. My experiences in online dating have convinced me of that. You have time to formulate responses. It doesn't matter what you look like or what you're wearing, you could be naked and picking your nose. The other person only perceives what you want them to. You are, in fact, creating a persona as you type. Say what you think they want to hear. Ask probing, meaningful questions that you had some time to come up with. Be funny, be intriguing, be what you've perhaps never been in real life; real conversation, real eye contact/facial expression land.
I fear we are losing these key communication skills. It scares me. How can one pick up on non-verbal cues if one is not exposed to them? How will this guy know if I'm upset if he's never seen it? How will that guy know that I'm smiling at his witticisms? It's a quandary, no doubt about it. And I want to be known, just like everyone else. I want people to know the real me, and to appreciate the person that I've forged over my 34 years.
It does happen, though, that sometimes the stars align, there's a harvest moon, or whatever fateful circumstances fall into place for meeting a truly neat person. I've met many very cool people here, and this week I met another. He's very nice and I'm excited to have a new friend. He's a musician and he's funny and he's straightforward and honest. He's a man, and I appreciate the heck out of that!
I also need to decide what I'm going to be for Halloween. Any suggestions? Also, totally stoked that my Little Dr. Smell (aka my sister Lindsay) is coming to visit next weekend. We are heading down to Savannah for a night on a mini road trip that should be very fun. And the following week I start on the editing process of Saving Haven. Plus I started a 40 day Pilates challenge that I'm three days into. Abs of steel coming up baby!
This was a bit of a ramble, but I did say I'd blog twice a week so this is what happened. I hope all are well, I miss so many of you, and I want to throw it out there, albeit a little early, that I am planning on having a Fancy Dress White Elephant party when I come home in December. You've all been warned!
Shanti Elena
Monday, September 16, 2013
Catch Up!!
Well Happy Monday to all of my favorite people! It's been a hot minute since I've posted on here, and as I've only just today gotten my assignment to blog twice a week *gasp* here's my first of this week, September 16th of the year 2013. What have I been up to since last I was on here? A whole heapin' lot! Let's start at the beginning, as I've heard it's a very good place to start.
The Trip Home
On Saturday August 24th I woke up bright and early and our new roomie Kate took me to the airport. I arrived a little too late, however, and missed my plane. It was a close call, and I could have probably made it if 1. I didn't have so much crap that I couldn't have in my luggage and 2. If the line through security wasn't so long. And so I got back in line at the check in desk, smiled sweetly at the man working, and said "I didn't quite make it." He was very obliging, telling me a flight was leaving in another hour and a half for Atlanta. Then he went "Oooh." I said "What oooh?" Turns out the next flight out of Atlanta wasn't until 5pm. And so I got to spend six hours in the Atlanta airport, where I bought a book: World War Z and had some gumbo and took long walks among artwork.
The Trip Home
On Saturday August 24th I woke up bright and early and our new roomie Kate took me to the airport. I arrived a little too late, however, and missed my plane. It was a close call, and I could have probably made it if 1. I didn't have so much crap that I couldn't have in my luggage and 2. If the line through security wasn't so long. And so I got back in line at the check in desk, smiled sweetly at the man working, and said "I didn't quite make it." He was very obliging, telling me a flight was leaving in another hour and a half for Atlanta. Then he went "Oooh." I said "What oooh?" Turns out the next flight out of Atlanta wasn't until 5pm. And so I got to spend six hours in the Atlanta airport, where I bought a book: World War Z and had some gumbo and took long walks among artwork.
By far the coolest sculpture
The plane ride itself was nice, as the gentleman at the desk had given me emergency exit window seats for both flights. On the little plane out of Asheville I sat next to this super hot guy from Salt Lake City, or at least he was super hot until I saw what he was listening to. An entire John Mayer album. Ew ew ew. I finally arrived in Portland at around 7 and my Mama picked me up and I was home!
The next day I got to meet this little lady for the first time:
The most adorable five month old EVER!
Had a nice lunch with Matt, Anna, Mom, Chloe and Audrey, followed by a little family barbecue which my dad came to as well. Monday mom and I went and got pedicures with my lovely friend Holly and Tuesday I visited with Jessie and little Aubrey for a good while.
Hello Blue Eyes!!
Then had a girls night with Jess, Jenn, and Janine. The triple J's.
On Wednesday I spent all day with Chloe and Audrey. By myself! I am such a super-auntie!
Chloe is getting so big!
I could go on and on about how much I love these little girls, but I'll spare y'all for now. Suffice to say that I miss them so much and I cannot wait to play with them more in December. They make me smile and bring so much joy and love!
Thursday I headed out to Estacada to visit friends, and we played for a few days. Jenn and Lori came to play with us and we had much fun. I did spend some time in contemplation during this last leg, mostly about how I loved visiting everyone but how I knew that home was two places now. As in, I was homesick for Asheville. Interesting stuff, that!
It was so wonderful seeing all the people I love, so wonderful to get some sunshine and happiness in. It's a true thing when I say that what I miss the most are the people who mean so much to me. I also sort of miss the no humidity thing, but that's pretty self-explanatory.
Home to Candler
My kitties were waiting for me when I got home, as was little Dali (Kate's adorable little dachshund) and of course good ol' cutie-pie Rufus, my buddy. Our house is full now, and the energy and life that came in with Kate is refreshing and lovely. We've had tons of company, lots of big dinners with friends and games and delicious drinks. Wendy and Steve sent me home with a bottle of Parfait d'Amore and so I was finally able to make these folks the legendary Lavender Martinis that I've been talking about for months. We had a real honest-to-goodness fire that we made s'mores on. With peanut butter cups. You're welcome. And while there has been some animosity between the dachshund and the kitties, that's been mended by super-star David who made them a kitty ladder out my window. And he also fixed our fan, our table, and our computer. Handy man to have around!
We've had dog visitors too. Here are David and Larry Bird napping:
Dali the Dachshund
One of the delicious dinners on the porch where even I helped!
See the Okra? I did that!
Can YOU Do the Charleston?
Our dear Molly's birthday is this coming Thursday, so as an early celebration we decided to head to Charleston for the weekend. We got the sweet hook-up from Molly's friend Leah and a big blue beach house for 300 for two nights! It was AWESOME! I even slept on bunkbeds! (Bottom bunk)
When we first arrived we took a nice rainy walk on the beach. And that water was so incredibly warm! So different than the chilly PNW coast for sure!
The following day dawned warm and sunny though, so we packed up a picnic lunch and headed to the beach for reals!
Kate, Leah, and Molly...beach ready!
Me on the beach! Check the sunshine people!
Kate letting the sun worship her!
My legs and the surf...ahhh
We hung out just us girls that night, having had a boy with us the previous night. (Adam, our friend who was watching Rufus, joined us for some drinking and relaxing. The porch at the house is completely screened in and even has a ceiling fan!) I got to know Leah and her friend Carrie well. All in all it was a lovely girls weekend. On Sunday it was HOT and we walked Rainbow Row and the Battery in downtown Charleston, then headed home. We had planned on going to a concert that night but it got postponed, which is just as well. We were beat!
So that's what's been going on in the life of Shanti. Playing hard, and now it's time to get to work. I have three writing assignments for the next two weeks: Blog twice a week, finish my short story, and write ten pages on my third book. I'm going to be busy! But don't worry, I'll squeeze some fun into there as well. And writing again feels so darn good all on it's own.
Until next you hear from me, which will be soon!
Shanti Elena
Sunday, August 18, 2013
Finally! I got some writing done! Chapter Three begins!
Hello friends! Last night, at a bar, surrounded by loud people and hanging out with football fans, sipping Angry Orchard Cider and listening to 90's rap, I wrote four pages of my short story! Woot! Obviously I just need a totally inappropriate atmosphere for the muse to strike. So here it is, the next installment. Enjoy!
The antiseptic smell woke me, the smell that always reminded me of hospitals. My eyes were heavy and when I finally got them open I shut them again with a curse. It was bright as hell. I tried to lift my hand to my face but my arm wouldn't budge. I risked opening my eyes again and glanced around. I was strapped to a gurney in a white room. Tubes led from my arms to a bag of blood that was a quarter full. Were they giving me blood? But no, my blood was dripping into the bag. They were taking my blood. Of course. But I hadn't thought they'd do it so humanely.
I tested the bonds. They were tight, metal. No Velcro for me. My legs were shackled in a similar manner. Resigned, I lay back against the gurney and waited.
The metal door sweeping open pulled me from my reverie. The woman with the clipboard and the white suit would have been pretty except for the alienness about her. She moved too fast, her face was too ageless. Her eyes, bright blue, were just like Frank's.
"I see you're awake, Noah," she said in clipped tones. She checked her clipboard, then glanced at the bag of my blood. "Almost done. Then we'll move you to a more comfortable location."
I cleared my throat. I wasn't sure what to say. "You...aren't going to drain me?" I finally got out.
She smiled. "Heaven's no, Noah. We wouldn't be that wasteful. And the boss wouldn't like it."
The boss. They had a boss? Well, it made sense that there would be a leader of sorts. The name on the Treaty had been simply the letter H.
"If you aren't going to kill me, then what am I doing here? Why take me? And what about the boy and the old lady?"
She tsked at me. "They are alive, though how long that will last depends on you I believe. Now, no more questions. Your blood pressure is going up and that could affect the process."
After checking a few more things: my temperature, my blood pressure, my heart rate, she left the room.
I was confounded. They didn't want to kill me yet they were taking my blood? The lives of the civilians depended on me? To what purpose? What did these creatures want with me?
When the bag was mostly full she returned and deftly removed the needle from my arm. She took my blood away almost reverently, stuck a needle in my arm that brought a warmth coiling through my veins. She closed the door behind her. I tested the bonds again. They hadn't loosened in the slightest. I didn't let panic overwhelm me. Whatever she'd given me began to take effect, and I drifted off before I could make any plans.
A gruff voice jolted me awake, either that or the drugs they'd given me had worn off. I'd never had much luck with sedatives. I glanced to my right and instead of the "nurse" of earlier two males leaned against the wall staring down at me.
They were of an age, if vampires could be defined by that. They'd probably been in their twenties when they'd turned. The one on the left had a scruffy beard and dark curly hair. He wore jeans and boots with a loose black shirt which his arms were crossed over. His body was heavily built, and the glare he was sending me should have maimed. His companion was shorter, slighter, clean-shaven. His hair was lighter but also curled. His expression was curious, almost eager. His clothing was more clean-cut, his hands in his pockets. I returned their scrutiny blandly. I badly wanted to lick my dry, cracked lips but I refrained. Best not to show any more weakness than I already was. Couldn't sink much lower than being strapped virtually naked to a table.
The gruff voice spoke again. It came not from the angry dark vamp, but the curious light vamp. "Amazing. Simply amazing. See how he stares at us? He does not know."
His companion grunted. "Why would he? And why should we care?" He broke my gaze and looked to the other. "We're wasting our time here, Felix."
"I think if he just knew..."
"She forbade it."
Felix sighed and sent me one more long look as he exited with the angry male. That look. Those eyes, so alien and yet...I had a son named Felix.
There was no point in fighting the wave of exhaustion that engulfed me then. Not yet. Instead I let my mind drift, and I thought of the fire.
The fire.
I'd smelled it before I'd seen it. The bedroom hadn't been burning around us as we'd talked of casual things, as in my nightmare. I'd pulled into the driveway after taking the boys to their grandparent's house. I'd smelled it, and I'd pulled out my phone as I'd sprinted to the door. The phone was new, a Christmas gift, and my thumb fumbled over the three numbers as I burst through the front door. Smoke greeted ne, heat embraced me, it's source the kitchen. I plowed through the smoke, screaming her name. I coughed at the foot of the stairs, rambling off the address, the urgency, before pocketing the phone and taking the stairs two at a time. Her name, repeated, and a hoarse answering cry that assailed my ears from the direction of the bedroom.
"Graham! Help me!"
By God I would. Eyes half blind, throat seizing, I found her. Heat blasted through the floor, melting my shoes. I lifted her, and she wrapped her arms around me. We were safe, together.
It was the hall floor that caved in below my feet, the hall floor that we fell through, into flame and smoke.
I couldn't know what I'd looked like, carrying her burned body out of the flaming building that had once been our home. They got it on tape, they'd showed me. But even I could hardly believe it. And I'd been there. Her body was red, angry, charred in places. Her long, gorgeous hair was gone. Her clothes, my clothes, were burned ruins, flaking away as I moved inexorably toward the ambulance. They took her from me, put her on a stretcher, wanted me to get on another one. Wanted to separate us. I fought them, pleaded with them, and they gave up and let me follow the ambulance in my car.
The next hours were terrible, terrifying. I let them examine me, let them show me the footage as they threw questions at me. My wife was near death, burned over 70% of her body. I was unscathed. I couldn't answer their questions. I only pleaded with them to save her.
And finally I slept in the waiting room, in my old jeans and t-shirt that I'd pulled from my trunk, my ball cap pulled over my eyes. And I awoke in a jungle hundreds of years and the devil only knew how many miles from that hospital.
Unscathed. Fireproof. Super-human. They wanted my blood. To drink? What had the nurse said? Something about not wasting it? And the two vampire males. One with my son's name. My younger son. My older son had his mother's dark hair, was built thicker, like me. Nicko. Nick for short. They'd been 8 and 10 when the fire happened. When I'd vanished. They'd been safe with their grandparents. What had happened to them when I'd disappeared? They would have felt so abandoned. I couldn't even think about their mother, too much pain. Had I saved her? Had she pulled through?
My head spun, my breath came in gasps. Something was trying to worm into my brain. Something dangerous. I let the nurse give me more drugs to calm me and said nothing, turning my head away. Had to think of the now. Had to learn what the enemy was planning. Had to escape.
There it is, until next time. Oh, and I quit my job because it was terrible. And I'm going to be home in less than a week! And then I'll have plenty to write about!
Peace and Love and Muses who finally got their acts together
Shanti Elena
The antiseptic smell woke me, the smell that always reminded me of hospitals. My eyes were heavy and when I finally got them open I shut them again with a curse. It was bright as hell. I tried to lift my hand to my face but my arm wouldn't budge. I risked opening my eyes again and glanced around. I was strapped to a gurney in a white room. Tubes led from my arms to a bag of blood that was a quarter full. Were they giving me blood? But no, my blood was dripping into the bag. They were taking my blood. Of course. But I hadn't thought they'd do it so humanely.
I tested the bonds. They were tight, metal. No Velcro for me. My legs were shackled in a similar manner. Resigned, I lay back against the gurney and waited.
The metal door sweeping open pulled me from my reverie. The woman with the clipboard and the white suit would have been pretty except for the alienness about her. She moved too fast, her face was too ageless. Her eyes, bright blue, were just like Frank's.
"I see you're awake, Noah," she said in clipped tones. She checked her clipboard, then glanced at the bag of my blood. "Almost done. Then we'll move you to a more comfortable location."
I cleared my throat. I wasn't sure what to say. "You...aren't going to drain me?" I finally got out.
She smiled. "Heaven's no, Noah. We wouldn't be that wasteful. And the boss wouldn't like it."
The boss. They had a boss? Well, it made sense that there would be a leader of sorts. The name on the Treaty had been simply the letter H.
"If you aren't going to kill me, then what am I doing here? Why take me? And what about the boy and the old lady?"
She tsked at me. "They are alive, though how long that will last depends on you I believe. Now, no more questions. Your blood pressure is going up and that could affect the process."
After checking a few more things: my temperature, my blood pressure, my heart rate, she left the room.
I was confounded. They didn't want to kill me yet they were taking my blood? The lives of the civilians depended on me? To what purpose? What did these creatures want with me?
When the bag was mostly full she returned and deftly removed the needle from my arm. She took my blood away almost reverently, stuck a needle in my arm that brought a warmth coiling through my veins. She closed the door behind her. I tested the bonds again. They hadn't loosened in the slightest. I didn't let panic overwhelm me. Whatever she'd given me began to take effect, and I drifted off before I could make any plans.
A gruff voice jolted me awake, either that or the drugs they'd given me had worn off. I'd never had much luck with sedatives. I glanced to my right and instead of the "nurse" of earlier two males leaned against the wall staring down at me.
They were of an age, if vampires could be defined by that. They'd probably been in their twenties when they'd turned. The one on the left had a scruffy beard and dark curly hair. He wore jeans and boots with a loose black shirt which his arms were crossed over. His body was heavily built, and the glare he was sending me should have maimed. His companion was shorter, slighter, clean-shaven. His hair was lighter but also curled. His expression was curious, almost eager. His clothing was more clean-cut, his hands in his pockets. I returned their scrutiny blandly. I badly wanted to lick my dry, cracked lips but I refrained. Best not to show any more weakness than I already was. Couldn't sink much lower than being strapped virtually naked to a table.
The gruff voice spoke again. It came not from the angry dark vamp, but the curious light vamp. "Amazing. Simply amazing. See how he stares at us? He does not know."
His companion grunted. "Why would he? And why should we care?" He broke my gaze and looked to the other. "We're wasting our time here, Felix."
"I think if he just knew..."
"She forbade it."
Felix sighed and sent me one more long look as he exited with the angry male. That look. Those eyes, so alien and yet...I had a son named Felix.
There was no point in fighting the wave of exhaustion that engulfed me then. Not yet. Instead I let my mind drift, and I thought of the fire.
The fire.
I'd smelled it before I'd seen it. The bedroom hadn't been burning around us as we'd talked of casual things, as in my nightmare. I'd pulled into the driveway after taking the boys to their grandparent's house. I'd smelled it, and I'd pulled out my phone as I'd sprinted to the door. The phone was new, a Christmas gift, and my thumb fumbled over the three numbers as I burst through the front door. Smoke greeted ne, heat embraced me, it's source the kitchen. I plowed through the smoke, screaming her name. I coughed at the foot of the stairs, rambling off the address, the urgency, before pocketing the phone and taking the stairs two at a time. Her name, repeated, and a hoarse answering cry that assailed my ears from the direction of the bedroom.
"Graham! Help me!"
By God I would. Eyes half blind, throat seizing, I found her. Heat blasted through the floor, melting my shoes. I lifted her, and she wrapped her arms around me. We were safe, together.
It was the hall floor that caved in below my feet, the hall floor that we fell through, into flame and smoke.
I couldn't know what I'd looked like, carrying her burned body out of the flaming building that had once been our home. They got it on tape, they'd showed me. But even I could hardly believe it. And I'd been there. Her body was red, angry, charred in places. Her long, gorgeous hair was gone. Her clothes, my clothes, were burned ruins, flaking away as I moved inexorably toward the ambulance. They took her from me, put her on a stretcher, wanted me to get on another one. Wanted to separate us. I fought them, pleaded with them, and they gave up and let me follow the ambulance in my car.
The next hours were terrible, terrifying. I let them examine me, let them show me the footage as they threw questions at me. My wife was near death, burned over 70% of her body. I was unscathed. I couldn't answer their questions. I only pleaded with them to save her.
And finally I slept in the waiting room, in my old jeans and t-shirt that I'd pulled from my trunk, my ball cap pulled over my eyes. And I awoke in a jungle hundreds of years and the devil only knew how many miles from that hospital.
Unscathed. Fireproof. Super-human. They wanted my blood. To drink? What had the nurse said? Something about not wasting it? And the two vampire males. One with my son's name. My younger son. My older son had his mother's dark hair, was built thicker, like me. Nicko. Nick for short. They'd been 8 and 10 when the fire happened. When I'd vanished. They'd been safe with their grandparents. What had happened to them when I'd disappeared? They would have felt so abandoned. I couldn't even think about their mother, too much pain. Had I saved her? Had she pulled through?
My head spun, my breath came in gasps. Something was trying to worm into my brain. Something dangerous. I let the nurse give me more drugs to calm me and said nothing, turning my head away. Had to think of the now. Had to learn what the enemy was planning. Had to escape.
There it is, until next time. Oh, and I quit my job because it was terrible. And I'm going to be home in less than a week! And then I'll have plenty to write about!
Peace and Love and Muses who finally got their acts together
Shanti Elena
Saturday, August 3, 2013
Peace, Nostalgia, and Loneliness on a Saturday Night
There is something to be said for quiet Saturday nights, the chirping of myriad insects and music on my laptop. Peace is what this brings, in an otherwise hectic world. Peace and a certain nostalgia, and a dash of loneliness.
Potent mixes bring out the deepest of thinking. Let's focus on one at a time, shall we?
PEACE
My name, Shanti, means this in Sanskrit. I wish for this in the world, but I believe most but the warmongering big corporations wish the same. I find this in music, in the babbling stream, in watching the fireflies dance and sitting around a crackling fire. I feel this with close friends, with laughter and fresh night air. I find this in the morning as I go on break at work, watching the sun rise and feeling the heavy morning air against my skin and filling my lungs. A full wallet, cuddling with my cat, accomplishing a daunting task, all bring this feeling. After an orgasm does too.
NOSTALGIA
Oh, for the good old days to be here again! This is a sentiment heard over and over from longtime friends reminiscing about how life used to be so much easier and enjoyable before bills, marriage, children, and 40 hour+ workweeks became the norm. Longing for the carefree days of youth, when all you had to worry about was getting to school on time and what the plans for next weekend were. This is all a misconception, of course, time making things seem rosier and better. There was a lot of crap to worry about back then, a lot of crap that we had to go through to become the people we are today. It was hard decisions, calculated risks, worry about popularity, weight, and zits. One thing that hasn't changed is the worrying about relationships. Will I ever meet "the one"? When will I have kids? Do I even want to get married? What do I want to be when I grow up?
My senior year of high school we filled out a questionnaire about where we wanted to be in ten years. I wrote that I wanted to write, on a boat, sailing around the world. 28 was six years ago, and now that I'm the ripe old age of *gasp* 34 I look back on those plans with a smile that has a little bit of brittleness around the edges. I've never stopped being idealistic, but realistic burst in somewhere along the line to ride shotgun. I also would be married by 28 and have my first kid by 30. Ha. So much for teenage Shanti's plans.
On the plus side, I have written, am writing, and will continue to write for the foreseeable future. I no longer plan on marriage, knowing it will happen if it's meant to but I've stopped holding my breath. Children? Yes please, at least one. 35 was to be that age, so coined at age 30. That's a short eight months from now, so I better get started! See how silly this planning stuff is? But without plans, what is there to strive for? Without hopes and dreams, what is the point of all of this?
And I still do not know what I want to be when I grow up, except happy. I definitely want to continue being happy.
LONELINESS
What would you be willing to sacrifice in exchange for a warm body in your bed at night? What would you be willing to risk to let another person into the innermost sanctum of yourself? Where do you find someone who is work the risks, worth the trust, worth the compromise?
I am alone, and I have been for some time. Charlie was around for many many years, but not in the way I ever perceived as a "healthy relationship". With him I sacrificed so much to have that warm body, and I risked heartbreak with my trust. I dated a kid named Robert when I was 20 for two months, and while it was fun for a bit, it ended, again, with anger and without closure. I have since come to a realization about a few things.
1. I'm extremely picky.
2. I have no idea how to tell if a man is interested in me unless he shouts it at me
3. I'm tired of being lonely but I don't know exactly what I'm looking for in a relationship
4. I want to be able to enjoy my sexual prime with someone before it ends
5. I am deathly afraid of feeling trapped
So. It's a bit of a catch 22, this relationship business. Sacrifice for serenity, or something along those lines. I'm a very independent woman, and a man who is willing to love me for and despite this is a keeper. As long as he's a bunch of other things that I know I want in a man. Picky.
Instead of dwelling too much on the state of my peace, nostalgia, and loneliness, I've decided to get a puppy. Probably not for a few months, but it's in the plans in the life of Shanti. I've never had my own dog, and it's an adventure I'm ready for. Said puppy will keep me company, go on walks and hikes with me, and shower me with love when I get home. Less complicated than a man, if somewhat lacking in conversation skills and other things. I don't know if everyone knows this or not, but my lease is up at the end of February and I have not yet decided where I'm going next. I don't plan on staying in Asheville, but I'm not sure I'll be ready to go home yet.
Thank you for reading this tidbit in the musings of me. Sorry I'm a bit behind in the blogging, but I hope this partway makes up for that.
Peace
Shanti Elena
Potent mixes bring out the deepest of thinking. Let's focus on one at a time, shall we?
PEACE
My name, Shanti, means this in Sanskrit. I wish for this in the world, but I believe most but the warmongering big corporations wish the same. I find this in music, in the babbling stream, in watching the fireflies dance and sitting around a crackling fire. I feel this with close friends, with laughter and fresh night air. I find this in the morning as I go on break at work, watching the sun rise and feeling the heavy morning air against my skin and filling my lungs. A full wallet, cuddling with my cat, accomplishing a daunting task, all bring this feeling. After an orgasm does too.
NOSTALGIA
Oh, for the good old days to be here again! This is a sentiment heard over and over from longtime friends reminiscing about how life used to be so much easier and enjoyable before bills, marriage, children, and 40 hour+ workweeks became the norm. Longing for the carefree days of youth, when all you had to worry about was getting to school on time and what the plans for next weekend were. This is all a misconception, of course, time making things seem rosier and better. There was a lot of crap to worry about back then, a lot of crap that we had to go through to become the people we are today. It was hard decisions, calculated risks, worry about popularity, weight, and zits. One thing that hasn't changed is the worrying about relationships. Will I ever meet "the one"? When will I have kids? Do I even want to get married? What do I want to be when I grow up?
My senior year of high school we filled out a questionnaire about where we wanted to be in ten years. I wrote that I wanted to write, on a boat, sailing around the world. 28 was six years ago, and now that I'm the ripe old age of *gasp* 34 I look back on those plans with a smile that has a little bit of brittleness around the edges. I've never stopped being idealistic, but realistic burst in somewhere along the line to ride shotgun. I also would be married by 28 and have my first kid by 30. Ha. So much for teenage Shanti's plans.
On the plus side, I have written, am writing, and will continue to write for the foreseeable future. I no longer plan on marriage, knowing it will happen if it's meant to but I've stopped holding my breath. Children? Yes please, at least one. 35 was to be that age, so coined at age 30. That's a short eight months from now, so I better get started! See how silly this planning stuff is? But without plans, what is there to strive for? Without hopes and dreams, what is the point of all of this?
And I still do not know what I want to be when I grow up, except happy. I definitely want to continue being happy.
LONELINESS
What would you be willing to sacrifice in exchange for a warm body in your bed at night? What would you be willing to risk to let another person into the innermost sanctum of yourself? Where do you find someone who is work the risks, worth the trust, worth the compromise?
I am alone, and I have been for some time. Charlie was around for many many years, but not in the way I ever perceived as a "healthy relationship". With him I sacrificed so much to have that warm body, and I risked heartbreak with my trust. I dated a kid named Robert when I was 20 for two months, and while it was fun for a bit, it ended, again, with anger and without closure. I have since come to a realization about a few things.
1. I'm extremely picky.
2. I have no idea how to tell if a man is interested in me unless he shouts it at me
3. I'm tired of being lonely but I don't know exactly what I'm looking for in a relationship
4. I want to be able to enjoy my sexual prime with someone before it ends
5. I am deathly afraid of feeling trapped
So. It's a bit of a catch 22, this relationship business. Sacrifice for serenity, or something along those lines. I'm a very independent woman, and a man who is willing to love me for and despite this is a keeper. As long as he's a bunch of other things that I know I want in a man. Picky.
Instead of dwelling too much on the state of my peace, nostalgia, and loneliness, I've decided to get a puppy. Probably not for a few months, but it's in the plans in the life of Shanti. I've never had my own dog, and it's an adventure I'm ready for. Said puppy will keep me company, go on walks and hikes with me, and shower me with love when I get home. Less complicated than a man, if somewhat lacking in conversation skills and other things. I don't know if everyone knows this or not, but my lease is up at the end of February and I have not yet decided where I'm going next. I don't plan on staying in Asheville, but I'm not sure I'll be ready to go home yet.
Thank you for reading this tidbit in the musings of me. Sorry I'm a bit behind in the blogging, but I hope this partway makes up for that.
Peace
Shanti Elena
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